a midsummer dream

So, when this summer started, I had twenty-one pieces I needed to edit and send out. I'd filled a binder with copies of drafts with written comments from professors, with clean copies for me to write on, with tabs for every story so I would stay organized. My goal was to maybe get two or three acceptances over the summer, since I was able to get two over winter break, and I would be happy and feel accomplished. It was a lot of work, but I was willing to put the effort in, because I genuinely thought all of these pieces were good enough to go somewhere.

By the end of June, I ended up finishing all twenty-one of those as well as three more stories to send out, bringing that total to twenty-four. I wasn't sure if I would be able to finish them, and I do still have two that need to be worked on, but I'm happy they were included. I'm happy I'll have time to finish the other two that I really wanted to work on. I don't know if I'll send them out, but at least I have the time to give to them that they deserve.

And I'm happy to announce that I'm now at six (not counting the two that are already published) acceptances.

I can only hope it keeps going like this. I'm so beyond happy and excited about this that it's sort of hard to convey the right emotions? I can't accurately describe how I feel, how it feels to know that my work is and will be out there, for so many people to see, and I still have a full year of MFA work to get through. Hell, there are still about seven weeks of break left, so who knows what'll happen between now and then? I never really expected to have so many pieces picked up over the summer. I never really expected anything to get accepted, if I'm being honest, because imposter syndrome is real. All I can think is the line from Radiohead's Creep, "what the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here. I don't belong here".

But here we are. As of today, June 19, 2018, I have six acceptances and two published pieces. I do belong here. And this is where I'll stay.